So.. I'm laying in bed, tired as heck, wanting to go to bed but just can't. So I start listening to music. I couldn't decide what to listen to... so I put my songs on shuffle. A song came on where the lyrics go..
"How could this happen to me
I've made my mistakes
Got no where to run
The night goes on
As im fading away
Im sick of this life
I just want to scream
How could this happen to me"
This song fills my head with so many thoughts of things that have happened in the past. I remember listening to this song after basketball games that we lost on. I remember feeling sick of my life and wanting to leave and run away. It makes me think of how easy life was then. Go to school, play sports, go home eat, sleep. You don't have to pay for much, you have parents who support you or who are there for you.
This has happened a lot to me lately. It happened last week and the song that came on made me crying thinking of summer of 2006 when I didn't care about myself and just partied all the time and drank. Granted I made some really good friends and lost some friends.
Then I think of him and how I met Mr. Big. I think of how much my time I lost becasue I loved him. Well, I did it. I got rid of Mr.Big. It's been almost a month. I am proud of myself for the fact tha I can do this and I am doing it.
Anyways... I just had a few of those thoughts going on.
Happy Tuesday!
Rachel
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